I’d like to talk with you about choices we make in life - and whether or not we always have a choice. To better explain what I am talking about, I am going to share the first chapter of my new book, Renewing Your Mind - Identity and the Matter of Choice. This chapter is titled:

Do You Believe You Have a Choice Regarding “Whatever It Is You Are Dealing With?”

The gay identity was one I never wanted, and it dawned on me one day that I should seek my Maker as to what His intentions were for my identity. My plan was to choose what He called right over what my feelings—and the world— called right. I chose Truth over comfort and momentary pleasure and found freedom from my old way of thinking. In the process, I found a heterosexual identity! In a world where a man could say he was born a man but was truly a woman on the inside—and be celebrated for it—one would think a man who did not want a gay identity and found a way to a heterosexual identity would be welcomed...tolerated. But I have not found the world too open about anything other than what feels good is right. Choosing righteousness over license is, in this current culture, not to be tolerated. Enough about that.

People often ask me if I am still tempted with same sex attraction. When I tell them that I still understand that temptation but it no longer has power over me, their reaction is often, “Then how can you say you’re changed? Nothing’s different if you are still tempted.” Nothing could be further from the truth.

Honestly, I had no choice in determining what would tempt me, but that in no way negates my ability to choose how I would respond to that temptation! In fact, even Jesus did not get to choose what He was tempted by—and He was tempted in every manner just as we are, yet without sin! We are either always creatures of choice or never creatures of choice. Our humanity has a conscience which gives us the power to choose. If we could not choose, every man would be a rapist. Every person would be obese. Every person would walk in constant anger. Every person would be hopelessly self-focused and full of pride. We always have a choice as to how we respond to a given situation. It just so happens that having a relationship with Christ gives us the power to overcome those temptations and to choose wisely much more easily than in our human strength! If temptation defined us, then we would succumb to the statement that “this is just who I am, so I might as well give in and be whatever my deepest feeling suggests I am.” Temptation does not equal identity.

I did not get to choose what I was tempted by. It was just there. But it was never intended to define me. Even without Jesus, I always had the choice as to how I would respond to any given temptation, be it sexual or otherwise. Always. It was only when I allowed the temptation to define me that I began to walk in failure and allow it to control me—control my life.

I recall the look and sound and feel of temptation in that area; I am reminded of it in the media and in the culture on a daily basis (does every TV show or movie have a same sex storyline these days? Pretty much). It’s in my face. But that “recalling” in no way defines who I am. Temptation is a joy. What do I mean? When temptation comes my way in any area that could lead me to sin, I simply ask the Holy Spirit, “What is it, Lord?” My reason is simple. The enemy—the liar, Satan—desires my downfall. Temptation is intended to lead me to that destruction. I turn to God because the temptation has become my signal that God is up to something. Why else would the enemy be after me in a certain area if not to quell the work of God in my life?

So much time has now passed since I identified as gay that it is actually difficult for me to believe I was ever that way. Of course, the liar does not want me to forget, so he continues to try and trip me up in key ways—not usually of a sexual nature, either. He attacks me in the areas of my continuing vulnerability: my sense of security or my sense of being needed or my sense of the need of affirmation—all of which are now daily met in knowing Jesus. I am now so secure that I do not fear vulnerability, nor do I fear for my security, nor do I fear that others might not think my life significant. Temptation has been relegated to use for the kingdom purposes in my life.

When it occurs, I do not allow it to determine my direction. In the moment of being tempted, temptation is now like a fly that occasionally tries to land on the meal of God’s presence in my life. I shoo the pest away with the Word and continue to enjoy the feast of God’s amazingly abundant presence in my life, whether I receive threats and hate from the LGBT community (and I do) or not. The temptation to fear harm is handled in the same way as sexual temptation. “What is it, Father? Your son, Dennis, waits on You...and while I wait, I will apply Your Word to my existence, bathing my being in being with you.”

People can say I am not changed if I still understand temptation in my life, but for the doubters, here is a brief list off the top of my head of exactly what has changed since coming to faith in Jesus Christ:

My belief system: I once believed I was born gay, until I was born again. I no longer believe I was ever born “that way.”

My mind: I was transformed by the renewing of my mind.

My sexual preference: I used to be sexually aroused only by men. The sexual needs of my life are now met only by my wife, and I crave her body, by the way...

My outlook on life: I once was depressed and self-serving. I now look toward Jesus and lay my life down for the King and for the kingdom.

That’s the end of chapter one, but I wanted to leave you with a song that is very personally important to my own life. It is called I Am Changed. I wrote it on March 20, 2013 in response to someone asking me if I was still ever tempted concerning my old identity. Their implication? If temptation still exists then I have not truly changed. Nothing - NOTHING - could be further from the truth. The song speaks for itself. Dennis Jernigan

To order a copy of the book Renewing Your Mind, go to https://www.amazon.com/Renewing-Your-Mind-Identity-Matter/dp/1613143737/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1523464180&sr=1-1&keywords=renewing+your+mind+dennis+jernigan

To listen to the Dennis Jernigan Podcast on this subject and to hear the song, I Am Changed, go to http://podcast.dennisjernigan.com/e/i-am-changed-a-choice-in-the-matter/

I Am Changed
Words & Music: Dennis Jernigan
March 20, 2013

Verse
Some call me a fool
For daring to say I’ve changed
If that makes me a fool
I wouldn’t trade what I’ve found for anything
I’m changed

Some call me a dreamer
For daring to walk away
From my old way of thinking
My old identity now passed away
I’m changed

Chorus
Changed from who I thought I was!
Changed by pure redeeming love!
Changed from death to life
And freed from every chain!
Changed from old identity!
Freed from lies and free to be
Who my Father says I am!
He calls me changed!
I am changed

Verse
Some call me a hater
For daring to disagree
Come to my own conclusion
Of who my Father says I am called to be!
I'm changed!

Some call me disillusioned
Some call it a mental break
Let there be no confusion
I am fully aware!
Fully awake!
I’m changed

I Am Changed - A Choice In The Matter